FunAntics Theater Scripts
Harry Potter Excerpts
BASIC
This play can be done with pretty much the same tables and chairs onstage, but reconfigured for each scene.
Required for all scenes:
Two sturdy card tables, either wooden or with tablecloths (together for Harry's bed, and separately for cafeteria)
3 wooden chairs, matching, nice if possible
A lightweight wooden hallway table/desk, approx 16" x 30" for top surface (for cash register table)
Harry Potter
and the Obnoxious Voice
“2011 -VERSION 3: After the Last Movie”
a parody by Jeannette Jaquish © 2007, 2009, 2010, 7/2011
Based on the book series by J.K. Rowling and the movies of the books.
Royalty must be paid to perform this play.
TECH NOTES & other endings are separate.
Music CD available.
Details at www.theaterfunscripts.com .
CAST OF CHARACTERS
Harry –
Ron –
Hermione –
Dobbie – (kindly, nervous)
Winky – (sharp tongued)
Hagrid -
Draco Malfoy -
Malfoy’s Friends (no lines) -
Snape –
Dementor -
Dumbledore -
Skrewt Student -
Little Hermione - (age 4 or older, small)
The Master - (white female, late 30’s or 40’s, light hair)
Extras -
OPTIONAL KITCHEN SCENE:
Luna Lovegood -
Moaning Myrtle -
5 to 12 or more HOUSE ELVES:
With lines:
- 1 - Apple
- 2 - Buffin
- 3 - Clerby
- 4 - Eggbert
- 5 - Flinker
PANTRY SQUAD ELVES (short chant):
Scrubber -
Tiny -
Pre-Soak -
Clod -
PIE FETCHERS (no solo lines)
Scooter -
Raisin -
Daffodil -
OPTIONAL TIME TRAVEL SCENES:
Future Potter - (desperate)
Optional: Future Cop 1 - (detective or bureaucrat)
Optional: Future Cop 2 -
Scene 1: HOUSE ELVES VISIT
(Harry Potter’s bedroom.)
Scene 2 (optional)
ARRIVING AT HOGWARTS -First Years to the Boats (in front of Closed Curtain)
Scene 3: FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL
(Hallway in the School)
Scene 4 (optional)
VISITING THE KITCHEN (End of day 1)
Scene 5: THE OBNOXIOUS VOICE
(Library - Middle of School Day)
Scene 6: CAFETERIA
Scene 6-B: MEETING THE MASTER
SCENES: Props & Sets
1 - Harry's bedroom: two card tables covered with bedding and pillow make bed. -Dobbie lies on it under bedding or under it at start of scene. Winky sits on it or leans against it during scene.
-Chair with cloak or coat that Winky hides under at start of scene.
Winky has root beer bottle with water in it.
-Socks on floor.
-Chairs and desk someplace out of the way.
-Put out more set dressings if you have time to remove them between scenes.
2 - Library hall
Table with big book. Other table, desk and chairs re-arranged.
3- Cafeteria
-Card table with food, (sandwiches in baggies, empty cans of soda, bags of chips, etc. )
-Desk with cash register, can of spoons, rag, (educational supply stores have good toy cash registers. I recommend the Learning Resources toy cash register which you can also order online and from Amazon.com)
-Card table with 3 chairs for Harry, Hermione & Ron
-Fake haggis pie & root beer float with straw.
4- Rowling - leave furniture as is. She plops typewriter, crumpled paper and whiskey bottle on top of eating table.
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MUSIC
May I suggest you get public domain classics such as Night on Bald Mountain, In the Hall of the Mountain Troll, Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy and Danse Macabre as between-scene music. Get old public domain recordings or buy the license from a producer who has re-recorded it, or get a musician to play from the original out-of-copyright sheet music.
Check out www.incompetech.com for some wonderful Creative Commons non-royalty music by Kevin MacLeod. You can download and play them and give a donation.
Can I use the Harry Potter soundtrack music in this play?
Answer: NOT WITHOUT PERMISSION FROM THE COPYRIGHT OWNER (not me). Royalties paid for this script do not authorize you to play the copyrighted movie soundtrack music.
This script is a parody and does not violate J.K. Rowling’s copyright. But the music is not parodied and is still under full copyright.
To use the movie soundtrack music you need to get a license from its copyright holder.
If you take the risk and perform with it anyway, I suggest you be respectful and give full credit in your program. -- "Soundtrack from the Motion Picture "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban". Music by John Williams."
As you know, paying royalties to perform this script does not give you rights to sell recordings or videotapes of your performance, except to your cast and only at a price to cover duplication costs. Using this music adds an additional prohibition upon you not to sell or even make copies at all. Even if you get the license to perform the music it does not license you to play it within a video of this show on YouTube. I give you permission to play my scripted show on Youtube, but I can’t give you permission to play the music on Youtube.
Using this music is risky and illegal. Get the performing license or don’t use it.
Get a license to use the Harry Potter Prisoner of Azkaban CD
Once you have that, you can play the tunes between scenes and before and after.
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COSTUMES:
Hogwarts: EXTRAS Basic white button shirt & back pants or plaid skirt with black graduation gowns or elegant looking lounging robes - get from 2nd hand store.
Harry, Hermione & Ron: Sweaters & jackets in 1st scene. Hermione & Ron should look grubby and ragged. They can wear ragged clothes over their school clothes.
Harry has a wand in pocket in cafeteria scene.
Malfoy - apron over white button shirt and dark pants, wand
Snape - sophisticated black fancy collared shirt, pants, cloak & wand
Hagrid - beard, wild wig, rustic brown shabby pants, boots, leather coat
Dumbledore - Santa wig and beard, stretched long, robe style velvety house coat, colorful boxers, shorts or stretch pants, slippers
Dementor - Black hooded Death costume- lots available for Halloween
Future Potter - anything dorky, then homeless raggedy clothes
Future Cops - weird uniformish, detectivish or bureaucratish
JK Rowling - sloppy pajamas and housecoat, carries out typewriter or laptop, movie review page from newspaper, liquor bottle, crumpled paper.